The current global pandemic has the capacity to cause many people to feel despair. What separates those who fall into despair from those who weather this storm more successfully? I believe the difference is how adaptable each person is. If your expectations remain the same as they were only a few weeks ago, you will be disappointed. Your expectations must shift to reflect a more realistic and current state of things. I keep thinking of one of the first scenes in my very favorite Christmas movie, Muppet Christmas Carol. Bob Cratchit (played by Kermit), asks his boss Ebenezer Scrooge (played by Michael Caine) about taking Christmas Day off.
Cratchit (Kermit): It appears to be closing time.
Scrooge (Kaine): I’ll see you at 8 tomorrow morning.
Cratchit (Kermit): Tomorrow is Christmas.
Scrooge (Kaine): 8:30 then.
Cratchit (Kermit): If you please, Sir. Half an hour off hardly seems customary for Christmas Day.
Scrooge (Kaine): How much time off is customary?
Cratchit (Kermit): The whole day.
Scrooge (Kaine): The entire day?
Cratchit (Kermit): If you please, Mr. Scrooge. Why open the office tomorrow? Other businesses will be closed. You’ll have no one to do business with. It’ll waste a lot of expensive coal for the fire.
Scrooge (Kaine): It’s a poor excuse for picking a man’s pocket every December the 25th, but as I seem to be the only person around who knows that, take the day off.
Business owners, board members, and many others who are responsible for both profits and providing income to employees, I’m so sorry you are having to make these difficult decisions right now. It sucks so much that you may have to choose to stop serving your customers and therefore, stop providing income to your employees. You may have to furlough them. You have have to come up with a completely different business model. Or you may need to put your business into hibernation for now.
As Bob Cratchit said, “Other businesses will be closed. You’ll have no one to do business with. It’ll waste a lot of expensive coal for the fire.” That income stream may not be available, no matter what measures you take. That’s not your fault. It’s just what is happening right now.
We’re all dealing with this same thing all at once. Some people happen to do things that mean they can keep working. Many others don’t. It’s completely random. Even some highly skilled people are losing all of their business all at once. None of you did anything wrong. You just happen to be good at something that isn’t able to happen right now.
To my thinking, they way to get through this is to find some way to use your skills, talents, and strengths to find a sense of purpose right now. For most people, that requires a lot of flexibility. I had to move my entire business model from an in-person model to a remote model in one weekend. I’ve reached out to my Yoga and Pilates teachers to see how I can continue to contribute to their income. I’m talking with my tenant about ways to keep her housed while still being able to pay my mortgage. You’ll need to get creative. I saw a friend who does movement work offer to drop off sterilized props and items for self-massage, then teach using Zoom. Restaurants are switching to takeout options, large portions for families, meal kits. This time may even mean that you do something that you haven’t ever done before. Think broadly, ask around, talk about ideas with your friends. What can you do from home? Can you call an older relative on FaceTime once a day? I’m not just talking about making money. I know you need money to live. We all do. But I’m really hoping we’ll all pull together to help each other through. If you want to avoid despair, you’ll need to find a way to experience purpose.
I don’t know what all of those creative solutions will look like, but I know that it’s good to ponder them right now. In the type of therapy I do, I talk a lot about identifying values. Once you know what your core values are, you try and make choices that move you in the direction of your values. I value connection. So I set up a Marco Polo group for my family, and I’ve set up a Netflix viewing party to watch a show later tonight. Doing that makes me feel like me, and it saves me from despair.
I hope that even during this very difficult time in our history on this planet, you can find some ways of spending time that feel meaningful to you. You are safe where you sit. You don’t have to have this all worked out immediately. Be patient with yourself and with those around you. We’re all learning so much right now. It’s daunting, but I am so interested to see how we all are once this has passed.
Cratchit (Kermit): It appears to be closing time.
Scrooge (Kaine): I’ll see you at 8 tomorrow morning.
Cratchit (Kermit): Tomorrow is Christmas.
Scrooge (Kaine): 8:30 then.
Cratchit (Kermit): If you please, Sir. Half an hour off hardly seems customary for Christmas Day.
Scrooge (Kaine): How much time off is customary?
Cratchit (Kermit): The whole day.
Scrooge (Kaine): The entire day?
Cratchit (Kermit): If you please, Mr. Scrooge. Why open the office tomorrow? Other businesses will be closed. You’ll have no one to do business with. It’ll waste a lot of expensive coal for the fire.
Scrooge (Kaine): It’s a poor excuse for picking a man’s pocket every December the 25th, but as I seem to be the only person around who knows that, take the day off.
Business owners, board members, and many others who are responsible for both profits and providing income to employees, I’m so sorry you are having to make these difficult decisions right now. It sucks so much that you may have to choose to stop serving your customers and therefore, stop providing income to your employees. You may have to furlough them. You have have to come up with a completely different business model. Or you may need to put your business into hibernation for now.
As Bob Cratchit said, “Other businesses will be closed. You’ll have no one to do business with. It’ll waste a lot of expensive coal for the fire.” That income stream may not be available, no matter what measures you take. That’s not your fault. It’s just what is happening right now.
We’re all dealing with this same thing all at once. Some people happen to do things that mean they can keep working. Many others don’t. It’s completely random. Even some highly skilled people are losing all of their business all at once. None of you did anything wrong. You just happen to be good at something that isn’t able to happen right now.
To my thinking, they way to get through this is to find some way to use your skills, talents, and strengths to find a sense of purpose right now. For most people, that requires a lot of flexibility. I had to move my entire business model from an in-person model to a remote model in one weekend. I’ve reached out to my Yoga and Pilates teachers to see how I can continue to contribute to their income. I’m talking with my tenant about ways to keep her housed while still being able to pay my mortgage. You’ll need to get creative. I saw a friend who does movement work offer to drop off sterilized props and items for self-massage, then teach using Zoom. Restaurants are switching to takeout options, large portions for families, meal kits. This time may even mean that you do something that you haven’t ever done before. Think broadly, ask around, talk about ideas with your friends. What can you do from home? Can you call an older relative on FaceTime once a day? I’m not just talking about making money. I know you need money to live. We all do. But I’m really hoping we’ll all pull together to help each other through. If you want to avoid despair, you’ll need to find a way to experience purpose.
I don’t know what all of those creative solutions will look like, but I know that it’s good to ponder them right now. In the type of therapy I do, I talk a lot about identifying values. Once you know what your core values are, you try and make choices that move you in the direction of your values. I value connection. So I set up a Marco Polo group for my family, and I’ve set up a Netflix viewing party to watch a show later tonight. Doing that makes me feel like me, and it saves me from despair.
I hope that even during this very difficult time in our history on this planet, you can find some ways of spending time that feel meaningful to you. You are safe where you sit. You don’t have to have this all worked out immediately. Be patient with yourself and with those around you. We’re all learning so much right now. It’s daunting, but I am so interested to see how we all are once this has passed.
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